ONLY CRAP!!!

THE BUBBLE BURST March 5, 2010

I knew the consequences will take some time to sink in. I’m generally slow with realizing things even if they are as apparent as they seem to be. This is because I tend to live in a bubble. A bubble consisting of hope and optimism and things that are not meant to be. But there comes a time when the bubble bursts and one has to face the reality. In this case, the reality sucks. It is terrible and it is harder than I imagined. You tell yourself that you are strong enough to handle things while deep down you know your vulnerabilities.

This is not the first time that there is silence between us. Most of the earlier ones, unlike this one, had the chance of being sorted out. While some where part of a bigger plan, All-Out one and All-Out two. While some “issues” where created for the sole intention of sitting and clearing things out where the whole issue at hand in itself was inconsequential. Looking back, irrespective of what the content was but those “sessions” where amazing to say the least. But this is the most different and difficult of all. This has the eerie presence of permanency to it and maybe our last few words have been spoken. What remains now-and-then is exchanging “pleasant” greetings and a nod of the head in agreement.I lied once and had the most unbelievably great time. But I always knew that it was not right. Don’t have the courage to lie again. It is easy to lie your way out of any situation but I’ve realised it is better to fight it out using the truth. Even though you need to pay a big price for it.

Maybe for her the loss is of a just-another friend. One who was never even close. Probably, I and this entire episode would want to be forgotten as a bad a nightmare. But it is way bigger for me. Life has a funny way of repeating itself. I lost one friend when I joined college here. And I am losing another when it is going to end. But this loss is huge. Like all other things we shall overcome, one day. Until then there is the wait and endurance.